This evening was spent much on reading. I felt obligated to read, because I bought these books and magazines in the first place for my own reading pleasure and personal development. Somehow, I thought I was trying to escape from an issue that has bothered me for quite some time. I have previously buried it in my subconscious mind. Alas, it was resuscitated again today.
After my half-day work today, I was due for a meet-up with a good friend of mine, whom I got to know back in uni days. Our last meeting was about 5 months ago. At that time, I thought it will simply be a means to rekindle our waning friendship, especially since we have met for close to a year (if my memory serves me well). Disappointed, however I was. Turned out that it was merely a meeting to sell me something. Not that I'm opposed to it; my justification was since we have not met and chatted for a year, it just is not something that I (and just about us all normal folks) will anticipate under such context.
The same thing happened again today. I was much better prepared this time around and somehow successfully predicted his objectives. I know consciously that I somehow fear the idea of a friend wanting to form a business partnership of some sorts or wish to invite me into some kind of deal to make money.
A prominent businessman once said that he will never invite his good friends into a business. A nugget of wisdom. I could not fully grasp his way of thinking when I first know of this - I was just a college student then. As my horizon widens, I slowly arrive at the opinion that Where monetary issue and interest are involved, a friendship can easily turn sour, however solid it might have been in the past. My brother has undergone a similar predicament. Being closed to him, I know quite a fair amount of details about the friction that exists between him and his friends. That partly explains my fear and admittedly some kind of resentment whenever this issue is touched.
On the fear issue, that was just the attachment of my part that friendship ought to be a bed of roses. That was simply an unrealistic projection. Conflicts do arise every now and then. Deal with it and move on!
I told mom about what I have been through today. Like all mother wanting the best for their children, she gave me a piece of advice in proverbial Hokkien which translates as "if the roots of a tree are strong, it can be fearless in the face of strong wind". Get your principles right and you shall be able to avoid getting unnecessarily influenced by others, my son.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Saturday, November 5, 2011
Relationship
In the past few weeks, my thoughts were predominantly occupied by the relationship issue. It was largely of the romantic department for I still remain unattached presently. Several moments of paradox and irony surface at interval. At one time I realise intuitively that this is not a compatible relationship; at another I make a decision (in my head only, not heart - which explains why sometimes decision made does not come to fruition or is not executed at all in the first place) that there is always an exception to the rule; that certain incompatibilities will be overcome by similarties. And by love - after all, they say love is the most powerful thing.
Compatibility issue has been a subject close to my heart, largely because I have previously had a glimpse into Chinese astrology and Western astrology. And because I have witnessed some relationships that work - by that I mean there is a spark, there is a sort of I-get-what-you-mean and you-know-that-I-get-it attitude between two people, despite that fact that there are individual differences in points of view. In short, there is chemistry or harmony between elements.
And I'm interested in this spark. Why opt for elements that don't have much interactions (think chemical interactions) when you can opt for spark, I thought.
As of yesterday, my decision has moved from head to my heart and finally come to the resolution that the relationship I intend to take to a new level should be best left at the base of the mountain.
Resolved. Relieved.
Upon waking up this morning, I suddenly have the realisation that in just about every type of relationship, there is one single ingredient that must be present in order to make THE difference - and rightly 80% of the difference. 20/80 rule!
Perhaps it is the power of the citrine crystal (which I wore last night before turning in) that brings about the expression of the thoughts buried deep in my subconscious into words. Citrine is able to "give concentration ability", I was informed.
So here is the secret ingredient for each type of relationships:
Spouse - loyal
Parents - filial
Siblings - helpful
Friends - helpful
Business partners - trustworthy
Colleagues - trustworthy
Teachers - grateful
Self - acceptance
Higher self/god - believe
Much unexpected is relationship with self. I am unaware that each person has a relationship with himself or herself until I read about it in one blogpost several years ago. Pretty much enlightening?
Compatibility issue has been a subject close to my heart, largely because I have previously had a glimpse into Chinese astrology and Western astrology. And because I have witnessed some relationships that work - by that I mean there is a spark, there is a sort of I-get-what-you-mean and you-know-that-I-get-it attitude between two people, despite that fact that there are individual differences in points of view. In short, there is chemistry or harmony between elements.
And I'm interested in this spark. Why opt for elements that don't have much interactions (think chemical interactions) when you can opt for spark, I thought.
As of yesterday, my decision has moved from head to my heart and finally come to the resolution that the relationship I intend to take to a new level should be best left at the base of the mountain.
Resolved. Relieved.
Upon waking up this morning, I suddenly have the realisation that in just about every type of relationship, there is one single ingredient that must be present in order to make THE difference - and rightly 80% of the difference. 20/80 rule!
Perhaps it is the power of the citrine crystal (which I wore last night before turning in) that brings about the expression of the thoughts buried deep in my subconscious into words. Citrine is able to "give concentration ability", I was informed.
So here is the secret ingredient for each type of relationships:
Spouse - loyal
Parents - filial
Siblings - helpful
Friends - helpful
Business partners - trustworthy
Colleagues - trustworthy
Teachers - grateful
Self - acceptance
Higher self/god - believe
Much unexpected is relationship with self. I am unaware that each person has a relationship with himself or herself until I read about it in one blogpost several years ago. Pretty much enlightening?
Sunday, October 23, 2011
Joy
This week I seem to get a little nostalgic.
I attributed such in part to the music that I listened to and in part to my good memory of past events, things and people. More so to those whom I care about a lot. Such memories are etched deeply in my mind.
A few days ago, I played a CD which I bought back when I was in my senior high school days. My subconscious mind unlocked many of the memories which I can still remember vividly. These were particularly from those days when I was in Form 5 - of the hard work I put in my academic work and of the joy of knowing that I had forged genuine friendship - ahh, pure bliss!
Consequently, I tend to cherish familial bond and friendship even more now. Knowing very well that these are what truly matter to our heart, despite our occassional relentless pursuit of other things which bring temporary satisfaction.
To all events in the past - I give thanks because you help me grow more as a person.
To all people which I have had a connection - I care for you even though we are distance apart or we have not talked to each other for quite some time.
I attributed such in part to the music that I listened to and in part to my good memory of past events, things and people. More so to those whom I care about a lot. Such memories are etched deeply in my mind.
A few days ago, I played a CD which I bought back when I was in my senior high school days. My subconscious mind unlocked many of the memories which I can still remember vividly. These were particularly from those days when I was in Form 5 - of the hard work I put in my academic work and of the joy of knowing that I had forged genuine friendship - ahh, pure bliss!
Consequently, I tend to cherish familial bond and friendship even more now. Knowing very well that these are what truly matter to our heart, despite our occassional relentless pursuit of other things which bring temporary satisfaction.
To all events in the past - I give thanks because you help me grow more as a person.
To all people which I have had a connection - I care for you even though we are distance apart or we have not talked to each other for quite some time.
Friday, October 14, 2011
GE session
Tomorrow morning I will be heading for a session on insurance at Great Eastern Mall. A session to attract people into the insurance-selling business, even though I was informed that that will be a session where one will be introduced to the insurance industry and GE position in the industry. A lot of things in life are well packaged, more so in business!
I am not particularly enthusiastic about the upcoming affair. But I do look forward to understand more about the insurance industry. At the same time to have a good gauge whether I want to jump on the bandwagon of insurance selling; if so, will it be GE; if so, will it be with the center and the people that I am going work with.
I'm especially picky about this. For I know any forms of partnership that seek to last for the long term need to be established on the grouund of mutual respect coupled with a sense of maturity and rationality in all dealings between each party. As much as profit and potential monetary reward ($) are foremost, I will without an iota of hesitance proceed to cast aside anything else if this is not met in the first place.
Let's see how it goes!
I am not particularly enthusiastic about the upcoming affair. But I do look forward to understand more about the insurance industry. At the same time to have a good gauge whether I want to jump on the bandwagon of insurance selling; if so, will it be GE; if so, will it be with the center and the people that I am going work with.
I'm especially picky about this. For I know any forms of partnership that seek to last for the long term need to be established on the grouund of mutual respect coupled with a sense of maturity and rationality in all dealings between each party. As much as profit and potential monetary reward ($) are foremost, I will without an iota of hesitance proceed to cast aside anything else if this is not met in the first place.
Let's see how it goes!
Friday, October 7, 2011
Taking it upon myself
As I drove back from work a while ago, something hit me in my mind and made me feel all the more resonated. Sometimes people used to tell you certains things, dispense certain advice, share certain experience; but it is not until time when circumstance is right that we begin to truly understand its meaning. And that's when we are resonated. Epiphany.
Epiphany I had was that I take it upon myself all results that ensue. For this, it means that I'm proactively carrying responsibility for the results that I want and need not be nudged unnecessarily by other people.
As I blog about this, I can't help but to write about something that started to bother me a couple of days ago. I would like to think that this probably comes about as a result of having the said epiphany.
I am actually at the crossroad.
Ironically, I am already close to a year in the workforce. Presumably, crossroad is a word that should occupies much of a fresh graduate's thought all the time. Foremost in their mind is the decision as to which job to choose. That is certainly not my case of course.
I was actually presented with an opportunity! No, I am not at the crossroad. For me, if I am at the crossroad, the decision ahead would be something that is related to the path that I have crossed. All other things will be considered bridges that sidetrack me towards a mountain I don't want to climb, a sea I don't want to swim in.
Correction: I am actually beside a bridge on the path that I walk.
The moment a decision is made that is when the destiny is shaped, so say Anthony Robbin. And indeed it is true.
I take it upon myself for every decision that I make. For this I need to be aware of the bridges that mislead me down the path that I do not want to walk. To continuously stay true to my heart what I want and at the same time not be lurued by the many million distractions out there. Integrity.
Epiphany I had was that I take it upon myself all results that ensue. For this, it means that I'm proactively carrying responsibility for the results that I want and need not be nudged unnecessarily by other people.
As I blog about this, I can't help but to write about something that started to bother me a couple of days ago. I would like to think that this probably comes about as a result of having the said epiphany.
I am actually at the crossroad.
Ironically, I am already close to a year in the workforce. Presumably, crossroad is a word that should occupies much of a fresh graduate's thought all the time. Foremost in their mind is the decision as to which job to choose. That is certainly not my case of course.
I was actually presented with an opportunity! No, I am not at the crossroad. For me, if I am at the crossroad, the decision ahead would be something that is related to the path that I have crossed. All other things will be considered bridges that sidetrack me towards a mountain I don't want to climb, a sea I don't want to swim in.
Correction: I am actually beside a bridge on the path that I walk.
The moment a decision is made that is when the destiny is shaped, so say Anthony Robbin. And indeed it is true.
I take it upon myself for every decision that I make. For this I need to be aware of the bridges that mislead me down the path that I do not want to walk. To continuously stay true to my heart what I want and at the same time not be lurued by the many million distractions out there. Integrity.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
New habit
It is the first day of the tenth month of the eleventh year in the twenty-first century!
All of a sudden I feel a tinge of positive emotion to write even at this hour as I would have usually turned in at this time. This must be the after effect of reading one of my favourite blogs - The Personal Excellence Blog by Celestine Chua. It was the blog that I first read while I was in my third year of degree study. It brings back a certain amount of joy, pride and freedom. These because those were the days where I was just a student whose responsibility is to study and earn good grades, which I usually did and often met my own expectation. Sandwiched among these positive emotions are, admittedly, a sense of insecurity and fear that I carry with myself. These because those were the days where lecture rooms look like a competitive ground for me where everyone are expected to strive to be better and better. A sudden drop in performance will somehow bring a slap in my face that I was just not good enough. But that was because I was just trying to get validation from others, I thought.
Then came Celestine Chua, the writer behind the blog whose passion to help others lead a life of excellence make me feel so in awe. It was at this time where I started to meditate after reading one of her posts on the benefits of meditation. After being in the workforce for more than a year, I find myself getting a little disintegrated and naturally, departing from what my ideal self is like. More and more, I feel like I am not who I was and not heading towards my best self. By this I mean along with the change that I have gone through, I had at the same time evolve into a different person, not one I aspire to but more to one where society expects to see. Not that I'm lamenting that society's views are distorting and not representative of the best that everyone can live up to (even though sometimes they can be), but I'm just expressing the thought that one should never look outward for who we want to be, but rather inward.
For this I want to revisit my old habit of meditating, which I have put on halt for more than a year. To bring about a calmer, grounded, loving, peaceful me with much clarity in thoughts.
And to eventually get connected to my true and best self!!!
All of a sudden I feel a tinge of positive emotion to write even at this hour as I would have usually turned in at this time. This must be the after effect of reading one of my favourite blogs - The Personal Excellence Blog by Celestine Chua. It was the blog that I first read while I was in my third year of degree study. It brings back a certain amount of joy, pride and freedom. These because those were the days where I was just a student whose responsibility is to study and earn good grades, which I usually did and often met my own expectation. Sandwiched among these positive emotions are, admittedly, a sense of insecurity and fear that I carry with myself. These because those were the days where lecture rooms look like a competitive ground for me where everyone are expected to strive to be better and better. A sudden drop in performance will somehow bring a slap in my face that I was just not good enough. But that was because I was just trying to get validation from others, I thought.
Then came Celestine Chua, the writer behind the blog whose passion to help others lead a life of excellence make me feel so in awe. It was at this time where I started to meditate after reading one of her posts on the benefits of meditation. After being in the workforce for more than a year, I find myself getting a little disintegrated and naturally, departing from what my ideal self is like. More and more, I feel like I am not who I was and not heading towards my best self. By this I mean along with the change that I have gone through, I had at the same time evolve into a different person, not one I aspire to but more to one where society expects to see. Not that I'm lamenting that society's views are distorting and not representative of the best that everyone can live up to (even though sometimes they can be), but I'm just expressing the thought that one should never look outward for who we want to be, but rather inward.
For this I want to revisit my old habit of meditating, which I have put on halt for more than a year. To bring about a calmer, grounded, loving, peaceful me with much clarity in thoughts.
And to eventually get connected to my true and best self!!!
Sunday, September 18, 2011
Old folks
Chatting with elderly people make me realise that what is important to them are 2 things:
1) A pair of listening ears
2) A loving heart that cares
Everything else just does not matters.
My thoughts after visiting an old folks home at Bukit Robson today.
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