This evening was spent much on reading. I felt obligated to read, because I bought these books and magazines in the first place for my own reading pleasure and personal development. Somehow, I thought I was trying to escape from an issue that has bothered me for quite some time. I have previously buried it in my subconscious mind. Alas, it was resuscitated again today.
After my half-day work today, I was due for a meet-up with a good friend of mine, whom I got to know back in uni days. Our last meeting was about 5 months ago. At that time, I thought it will simply be a means to rekindle our waning friendship, especially since we have met for close to a year (if my memory serves me well). Disappointed, however I was. Turned out that it was merely a meeting to sell me something. Not that I'm opposed to it; my justification was since we have not met and chatted for a year, it just is not something that I (and just about us all normal folks) will anticipate under such context.
The same thing happened again today. I was much better prepared this time around and somehow successfully predicted his objectives. I know consciously that I somehow fear the idea of a friend wanting to form a business partnership of some sorts or wish to invite me into some kind of deal to make money.
A prominent businessman once said that he will never invite his good friends into a business. A nugget of wisdom. I could not fully grasp his way of thinking when I first know of this - I was just a college student then. As my horizon widens, I slowly arrive at the opinion that Where monetary issue and interest are involved, a friendship can easily turn sour, however solid it might have been in the past. My brother has undergone a similar predicament. Being closed to him, I know quite a fair amount of details about the friction that exists between him and his friends. That partly explains my fear and admittedly some kind of resentment whenever this issue is touched.
On the fear issue, that was just the attachment of my part that friendship ought to be a bed of roses. That was simply an unrealistic projection. Conflicts do arise every now and then. Deal with it and move on!
I told mom about what I have been through today. Like all mother wanting the best for their children, she gave me a piece of advice in proverbial Hokkien which translates as "if the roots of a tree are strong, it can be fearless in the face of strong wind". Get your principles right and you shall be able to avoid getting unnecessarily influenced by others, my son.
